


The Inferno

by BleedingCoffee



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist - All Media Types, Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood & Manga
Genre: Royai - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-16
Updated: 2016-01-29
Packaged: 2018-05-07 03:47:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 19,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5442221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BleedingCoffee/pseuds/BleedingCoffee
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Roy Mustang is injured and during his recovery becomes obsessed with an Aerugian classic, The Inferno. His team tries to find a meaning behind it as time runs out to get their Colonel back before Prince Claudio's visit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Limbo

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own FMA
> 
> Summary: Roy Mustang is injured and during his recovery becomes obesesed with an Aerugian classic, The Inferno. His team tries to find a meaning behind it as time runs out to get their Colonel back before Prince Claudio's visit.
> 
> Warnings: injury, drugs, ghost, RoyAi, creepy ass Pride. Angst.
> 
> AN: Was a FMA Fic Contest entry for prompt 290:Cool back in 9/2014 and also used for FMAWeek2015 Day 2 prompt Fear. It's complete, just needed cleaned up so I decided to get it posted. The Inferno is one of my favorites which, as you can imagine, was not a difficult connection to make.

_The Inferno_

Chapter 1

**Limbo**

* * *

Fighting villains on top of moving trains was impossible. The wind velocity alone was enough to nullify it as an option as a course of action, physics would not be ignored just because it stirred up an image of the daunting hero. It was something best left to the silent films, radio serials, manga NOT field reports. It was  _not_  going to be something that would end up in the Flame Alchemist's autobiography, however it was going to be in the Fullmetal Alchemist's obituary if the dumb shit didn't start listening to his superior officer!

Yup, that was what he said. Yet here he was,standing on top of the passenger car of the westbound train with his black trench coat whipping behind him as he struggled to maintain balance on the steel roof. His arm was stretched out, gloved hand poised to snap, as his dark eyes teared up in the on rushing wind. Roy knew his time was running out, the train had slowed down for this treacherous curve but would be speeding up again in a matter of minutes.

Then there was that little added bonus: The fact that he opted to chase his prey to the roof just as the

train approached the dangerous section of track. A ridiculous place to run a railroad track, the cliche "Deadman's Curve.", where some moron surveyor deemed it a necessity to lay track within a few feet of a cliff. Probably the same idiot who designed their uniform pants.

It was the stuff great novels or movies were made of. In reality, it was scaring the shit out of him and he wished that Hawkeye had been able to stop him before he recklessly charged up here. Instead she was behind him, kneeling with her rifle aimed at the train hijacker. They must have looked picturesque, him standing off to the side just enough to give her clearance to shoot, both of them a fearless force representing the mighty Amestrian military who bowed down to no one; Not a hijacker. Not physics. Not common sense.

Hawkeye was going to rake him over the coals for this one, he deserved it too, for putting her in harm's way like this. However at this moment he was standing here on a train with wind blowing in his face, pretending like he had a play. He didn't. Even he couldn't control the flame in this wind, it would blow back and roast them both alive if he snapped.  _Well done Roy!_  Shit...that wasn't even intended to be a pun.  _Focus, idiot! This is your fault, fix it!_

So when he heard a gunshot he expected the man in front of him to go down, not to hear a yelp as his Lieutenant slid towards the edge of the train car. Everything went in to slow motion. His eyes darted down, registering the body sliding towards the edge as he launched sideways to grab her. He landed flat on his stomach, grabbing her rifle as it was the only thing his fingers could get a hold of as she slipped off the side of the roof. His heart seemed to quit beating for a split second right before it exploded in a rapid burst of beats thanks to the panic.

Riza slammed into the side of the passenger car. She looked up, not comprehending how the rifle she was still holding on to could get caught on something and save her from plunging to certain death. Then she saw them, the white gloved fingers wrapped around her gun stock right. She was already being tugged back up, her legs scrambling against the windows to try and push herself back to safety. One more tug and she could see on top of the train again and to Roy's panicked eyes as he struggled to save her.

She felt her own eyes grow wide as the shooter walked over with his Enfield in hand. She knew she was shot, a throbbing pain in her left shoulder told her that once her adrenaline ebbed she would be more aware of the hole in her flesh. However, right now that man wasn't pointing the barrel at them, he was showing them the butt plate. She watched her Colonel's face go from fear to agony as the shooter slammed the butt of the rifle into his clenched right hand. She couldn't hear anything because of the wind, but it saved them both from hearing bones crack. Bones in his hand, those precious hands that conjured his trademark alchemy or caressed her ever so gently when nobody was looking. Those hands that were wrapped around the wooded stock of her rifle. One of the two hands that was stopping her from plummeting off the side of this cliff.

She was helpless to do anything but watch as the gunman struck again. Roy gritted his teeth as his bones crumbled under the assault. With tendons no long having attachments to manipulate, like a puppet master who's marionettes has been eaten away by termites, his right hand went limp as it was no longer serviceable. Somehow, in that millisecond where his grip released and her weight pulled the rifle back towards the edge, he hooked his wrist under the leather rifle sling that still lie between them on the rooftop. Shattered hand no longer useful, he wrapped it up in the worn leather sling to provide

an anchor.

It happened so fast she couldn't blink. The look on his face was as complex as the array etched in her back; agony, terror, desperation, confusion and devotion all wrapped into one god-awful look on his face. Then the hijacker turned his rifle around and aimed at the left hand with the more dangerous end of his firearm. She looked up in horror as the man pulled the trigger, the recoil seemed to put him off balance on the roof for a few moments but her eyes were drawn to the blood that split out of the hand on her right. Roy's hand.

Roy screamed as the bullet ripped through his hand and the metal roof and probably embedded itself in someone below. Tears streaked down his face as the pain and desperation clawed at him. Then his heart stopped as he watched her hand move. Her left hand moved a few inches to the center of her gun, the she let go with her right hand. "Lieutenant!"

Riza had enough of being he helpless damsel and gritted her teeth as her body pulled down on her wounded shoulder. Her right hand reached for her pistol as she heard Roy's cry. A pitiful wail, a desperate plea to not lose faith in him or leave him.

He watched her gun emerge from the abyss behind her and the muzzle flash as she shot the

man trying to destroy his ability to hold on to the one thing he needed most in this world. The gunman flopped off the train car and bounced his way down the cliff side allowing him to concentrate on Riza. The pain was intense, but the thought of losing her far worse. "Lieutenant!"

Riza holstered her gun and put her hand back on the rifle, the pain from her wound screaming at her the entire fifteen seconds it took to dispose of the man. She looked at Roy, his face betraying his agony and fear as if his strained scream didn't tell her enough. She tried to pull herself up but couldn't get enough purchase to move up while dangling off the side of the moving car and fighting the wind.

The fact was now that his right hand was useless and his left marginally functional. His boots were slipping from where they hooked on the rivets keeping the roof panels together: that was hardly optimal either. The train was picking up speed as they began to come out of the curve. He looked into Riza's eyes and said, "Can you climb up me?"

She got a foothold on the window and pushed up on it only to have it slip off and yank them both closer to the edge. "Let go of me."

"Never!" He growled through the pain. "Dammit Lieutenant, get your ass back up here on this roof!"

She felt him slip closer to her and realized it was going to have to be her that let go. If not he would be pulled over with her. "Sir, I'm sorry..."

"Sorry my ass." He hissed. "I gave you an order Lieutenant!"

She could hear the panic in his voice even with the wind in her ears. Still, even at this moment they weren't going to break protocol. Still so formal, even as their eyes expressed the torrent of emotions threatening to swallow them both us. Devoted to the end. She swallowed hard and wished her last glimpse of him wasn't going to be his pain wracked face and pleading eyes.

"Oh my God, you're such an asshole!"

Riza glanced up as a grinning teenage alchemist placed his hands on the rooftop and gave her a ledge to stand on using his alchemy. Edward Elric, master of timing. He must have had a internal compass that directed him to the center of chaos , because that kid was always making an appearance when hell broke loose. Then a ladder materialized beside the shelf he made under her and she pulled herself back up.

Ed glanced over at Mustang, prepared to ask him if he was going to revise his colorful commentary on his field report about 'only fucking idiots pick fights on top of train cars' but saw the man's face and thought better of it. It felt like someone kicked in him the stomach as he saw the pain wracked face of his superior, Mustang must have been in excruciating pain. Tears were rolling down his cheeks and he was shaking a little. He put a hand on the man's shoulder, concern for the man's now paramount. "Colonel, are you OK?"

Riza crawled over to her Colonel and wrapped herself over his prone body. "Ed, his hands are broken. Please help me get him to the top of the car. Please get some help to get him down. Please."

Ed blinked. Mustangs hands? His weapons? He could see the man try to steel his nerves, wash the look of pain from his face but it wasn't happening. "Right."

"No." Roy said though gritted teeth. "Get the hijacker. He's heading to the engine. We...will make our way to the front, if they are taking over the train I can..."

Riza gripped his coat in her fist. Damned stubborn man! "Help me pull him up, Ed."

Roy pushed back the pain as Ed grabbed him by his boot to help pull him back to a more stable position. He had no choice but to allow his hands to drag across the rooftop. "I'll still be able to control the fire in the engine. Just catch him."

"Right." He looked at Hawkeye, unsure what to do. This wasn't what he expected to find when he got on the roof, "I'll send Al up here! He can make a hole in the roof and get you into the car."

Hawkeye watched him scamper across the roof and drop down the ladder. He was rattled seeing his Colonel incapacitated and so was she. They all would be. Then she laid over Roy and wrapped her arms around him to ensure he didn't slide anywhere, trying to avoid thinking about an uncertain future and how she could do nothing to ease his pain. "You damned fool."

He looked at his hands, still tangled up in her rifle and wondered what the hell he was going to do without them. He pushed himself up on his elbows and felt Hawkeye wrap herself around him tighter. At least he still had her. No matter what life took from him, as long as he had her it was going to be fine.


	2. A Dark Woods Where the Straight Way Was Lost

_The Inferno_

Chapter 2

**'A Dark Woods Where the Straight Way Was Lost'**

* * *

As soon as the doctors left the room Riza had to stop herself from instinctively reaching for Roy's hand. He gave her a halfhearted smile as she looked for a place to touch his exposed arm. Bandages still were wound around his injured hands, his wrist was swollen and an IV was snaking it's way into the bend of his elbow. She settled for softly stroking his bicep and tried to appear upbeat.

"Riza, it will be fine." Roy could hear the uncertainty in his own voice and cleared his throat. She was wearing a sling from where she had been shot in the shoulder and he could see the dark circles under her eyes that betrayed her restless nights. He could hear Bradley's commentary in the back of his mind,  _"Colonel, why is it that your team racks up more bills in personnel and property damage than some of our divisions on the front lines of Aerugo?"_ It was true. People under his command did get hurt and killed. This time it was so much worse, this was his own stupidity and cockiness that put Riza in danger. Yes, he managed to get his hand shattered and the other one shot, but most importantly he almost lost Riza. When he closed his eyes he saw her sliding off the roof of that train as it took that dangerous curve, in his dreams he wasn't in time to save her.

She squeezed his arm again to get his attention. If she ventured to say anything right now she was afraid she'd break down crying. It had been two days since the failed mission, or rather the mission on which she failed to protect her Colonel. She had been shot in the shoulder and he saved her life, at the cost of his own. Sure he was lying here alive in front of her, but she had seen that brave facade crack during the last few days and they both knew the future looked less than promising. The Flame Alchemist without use of his hands. The Colonel who couldn't pick up a pen more or less sign his own name. The hero who was at the mercy of a surgical team to piece him back together. In one swift move, he had been shattered; body as well as purpose. All because of her. She knew he was blaming himself too, which was the hardest thing to swallow.

"It's going to be fine." He took his 'good' hand and reached over to put it over hers. Sad that his usable one was the one with a hole in it. At least the bullet that ripped through his hand left him a thumb and pinkie usable, he needed it to awkwardly reassure her. "Stop blaming yourself."

"Roy..."

"Riza, my whole life I've been defying the odds and I'm not going to stop now." The doctors had given him a very slim chance of a full recovery, but they would try.  _'There is always automail'_ , that line made him squirm. Trade feeling for functionality, it was like being in Ishval again. Maybe this was his punishment, losing his hands because he pushed aside feelings to get the job done. Hands that destroyed were now destroyed.

Riza thought about his statement, it was true. He shouldn't even have made it this far. An orphan of mixed race. A boy who grew up in a brothel home schooled by women of ill repute. A self educated alchemist who convinced a hermit to teach him his secrets. A war veteran who would not be consumed by his personal demons. A young Colonel carrying the future of a country on his already heavily burdened shoulders. She reached out and pet his hair, the gesture always brought a smile to his face. He loved to be petted and he leaned into her touch like a cat.

"It's going to be fine." If he kept saying it, maybe even he could start believing the statement eventually. He sat up and shifted back a little, her watery eyes looking at him as she squeezed his upper arm. He glanced at the door before leaning over to give her a kiss.

She smiled and he gave her a wink before settling back down into the pillows. It had taken one day to assemble the best doctors in the country and together they would use alchemy as well as typical pins and screws to try and make something of the mess that was the Flame Alchemist's hands. He was, after all, the pride and joy of the Amestris military; they were obligated to show the world that they could always put him back together again. It wasn't that she doubted the ability of the medical team, it was that when he was in surgery, he'd be out of sight for hours. It had taken a fight on her part to even be here. She simply repeated that she was his bodyguard and this was his most vulnerable hour and his life had already been targeted once. When that didn't work she reminded them that she only needed one hand to fire a gun. "I'll be right outside waiting for you. Everyone else will be visiting later after work."

"Well be sure to keep Catalina on a leash, I don't need her running over to grope at me while I'm unconscious." He said and that got a brief flicker of a smile to flutter across her lips. The idea of Rebecca lusting over him was a ludicrous one, but it did manage to catch her off guard.

"I have your watch, wallet, gloves and uniform, like you requested." She patted the bag on her lap to show she obeyed his instructions. He had insisted he go into work this morning to reassure the staff that he wasn't weak, that this wasn't a setback. In order to do that he had to be dressed like he wasn't checking into the hospital as soon as he left, though she knew he need the assurance himself as much as everyone else did. There was comfort for all of them seeing him as their smartly dressed, cocksure Colonel. He managed to get one glove on his shot hand, the other hand remained wrapped and hidden under the black trench coat hung on his shoulders. Roy Mustang, a master of the charade no matter which part he needed to play. Even she felt a surge of confidence seeing him like that, only to lose it when he got in the car next to her and his face betrayed the pain he was hiding.

"I don't need my lieutenant right now, I need the woman I love." He leaned over towards her and whispered. "Stop blaming yourself and start telling me about all those sponge baths you're going to give me when I get home."

She watched his dark eyes shift to the door before he moved to lay back down. "I'll buy a new sponge."

"One of those Luffy sponges?" He smirked.

"Loofah sponge." She corrected him.

The door opened and Dr. Dresden walked in with a syringes and a clipboard. Roy tried to steel his nerves, the idea of being sedated and immobilized bothered him. "I guess it's time."

"I'll be waiting outside, sir." Riza stood and had to force herself to walk away from him. She was his bodyguard, nothing more, and she didn't get to sit in on his private doctor patient consults. The doctor waited for her to close the door before he walked over to the bed and she turned around and looked in the window of the hospital room door to see the man emptying a suringe into the I.V. She took a deep breath and stood next to the door to wait for them to wheel him out and into surgery. Then she would sit in the room alone and try not to go mad.

* * *

Roy had been intrigued, scientifically of course, by the description of the drug Midazolam when Dr. Dresden had initially discussed the surgery with him. Now, however, as he lie under the lights in the operating room it was beginning to sound like a bad idea. Not just because he didn't want to be awake when they filleted his hands opened and started throwing bits of bone in tray next to him, but because the notion of drug induced amnesia was actually terrifying.

He stared up at the light and wondered who had developed this drug and for what purpose. A drug that would make you tired and relaxed, but also cause anterograde amnesia; short term memory loss, helpful when you don't want to recall being awake during a surgery. Yes, it had usefully applications in the medical field but that wasn't his initial thought. His mind drifted back to the alchemists who he had known and the look of abstract horror in their eyes as they told tales of their experiments sanctioned by the state. What had started out as good intentions quickly was corrupted by the military for the purpose of destruction: alchemy, TNT, corn syrup, instant coffee, fangirls...so many things that created for good and used for evil.

He closed his eyes briefly, whatever drug they had given him to immobilize him for surgery was also making him a little groggy. He heard the doctors chattering and just chose to drown them out. Last thing he wanted to hear again was "What a mess!" or "I'm a doctor Jim, not a magician."

"Hello Colonel Mustang."

Roy opened his eyes and looked from side to side and waited for the person to appear. How weird, it sounded like a child's voice. He felt goosebumps on his skin and felt cold, though his muscles were so relaxed from the narcotics that felt detached from the involuntary shiver. It was cool, almost like a freezer, and he wondered if maybe Barry the Chopper was working as a surgeon for the military. Some of those surgeons on the front were butchers, amputating limbs just because they got a cut for automail sales later on. Damn. If his thoughts were wandering and disconnected now, what was it going to be like in a few hours? Too bad he wasn't going to remember any of this, Riza would be amused by some of it.

He heard another 'tink' as a piece of bone was discarded. Did he remember what they told him they were going to do with it? Oh...that's right, they had someone who could use alchemy to restructure the bone into the correct shape: the alchemist with the googly eyes and gold tooth. Wasn't that a neat idea? Broken bones fixed by alchemy? They'd re-craft the bone and reattach the ligaments. If it didn't work he could always have it amputated and get a metal hand. Or maybe a pirate hook. Yar.

He was interrupted in his thoughts as the sound of a chair wheeling over confused him. Was he in the office and dozing off again? Then he saw someone emerge to his right and was even more confused. Why was the Fuhrer's son in here?

Selim Bradley folded his arms and put them on the table, now able to see to the top of the gurney thanks to the chair he was now kneeling on. "I forgot you can't talk after that drug they gave you. It's OK, my Dad says you tend to talk too much anyway. "

This was weird. Of all the things he could hallucinate about, he was thinking about this creepy ass kid? Why couldn't he imagine Riza in a nurse's outfit?

"See, I thought we might want to have a little talk. We have something in common, a little thing called Pride." Selim touched the man's nose and was amused that his eyes crossed watching his finger. "I can see why you'd be so happy with yourself. You're handsome, smart, popular. I mean, I won't bore you with your long list of accolades and achievements, last thing you really need is an ego boost. You really do have everything going for you! Going to be weird to see you having to rub your hands together to make flames, but I guess these guys here are planning to fix that. Perks of having a philosopher stone. You'll be back to your dashing self in no time!"

Wait...what was that about a philosopher's stone? Nah, stupid kid probably believed in unicorns too.

Selim took some surgical clamps and began to put them in Mustang's hair like barrettes. "I thought since you have a few hours to spare we might have a little chat. Plant a few seeds in your brain before we inject you with that memory wipe and see what sticks. Curious to see what exactly we can tell your subconscious and have you recall. They altered the drug a bit for you in one of the labs, so memory of our conversation will be gone but the facts discussed will linger. You'll just process the memory differently and come to your own conclusions. You're an interesting man with a lot going on in your head, some things we're not too thrilled about."

 _Dammit kid, if you're going to play with my hair at least pull out the gray ones!_ He could yell all he wanted, no sound came from his mouth.

Selim held up seven fingers. "You know the seven deadly sins right? Well I know you and your little sidekick Fullmetal have been uncovering some information as of late that will eventually lead you down the road to finding out that homunculus are real. There are seven of us, all named quite humorously after mankind's sins."

Roy was feeling the cold grip of panic take a hold of his heart. Secrets, now flowing out of the mouth of some kid as he lie helpless on the table. He wasn't even sure if this was real or if his mind was torturing him like it always did. Still the chill of fear was genuine and he could feel his heart start to thump.

"Pride. That's me." Selim poked the man in the chest. "Your sin too. Thinking you're better than us, thinking you are untouchable. Yet here you are, broken and helpless. Just like a human,  _weak_."

Roy was trying to will his body to obey him, hoping that his racing heart was enough to push the drug from his veins by force. He knew better. The drugs has to be metabolized, it would have to break down before he could be rid of its control over him.  _Shit!_  He could think about how to break down the molecular structure of the compound but without use of his body he wasn't able to use alchemy to do a damned thing about it.

"So shall we chat a little? I'd hate for you to be bored while these gentleman are putting you back together." Selim smiled as he saw the fear in the Colonel's eyes. He was glad he still had some minor ability to move his muscles as the expressions on his face were just  _priceless_.


	3. Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here

_The Inferno_

Chapter 3

**'Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here'**

* * *

Riza picked up the pills from the counter and brought the cup of tea over to the coffee table in Roy's living room. She set the tea on the table to cool and placed the post-op pill collection on the table beside it. He gave her a brief smile before returning to his book, not bothering to comment or jest about her having to feed him the drugs like an invalid. She went back to get their plate of dinner from the kitchen.

The outside world believed she was one of the girls that worked at Madam's Christmas's place. Each night she'd slip out the back door of her apartment complex and make her way to the bar to change into a disguise, then take a cab to his apartment. The guys at the office were jealous that the Colonel got to have a real stripper nurse tend to him at night and she assured them that Elizabeth was just watching over him and making him take his meds. Oral jokes ensued, at least they were keeping their spirits up. They thought she was an angel for letting Hayate stay with him to keep him company, everyone knew how much the man liked dogs.

The recovery from surgery had been uneventful. The doctors had readjusted their prognosis and seemed a little more optimistic that Roy might recover use of his hands. She expected him to be excited about that, but he had been preoccupied since he regained mental clarity after the drugs from the operation wore off; he couldn't wait to get home as he was dying to catch up on his reading. So she made sure she listened along with him as Dr. Dresden explained the prescriptions, care and expectations following surgery. She'd have to relay that information to  _Elizabeth_ , his night nurse.

That was two days ago and he didn't take his nose out of that book for longer than an hour or two. It wouldn't be strange if it was an alchemy text, but instead it was an old Aerugian classic  _The Inferno_. Considering his mental state, she had been worried he picked a work about a man's travels through hell, navigating through the circles housing the condemned sinners. One more reason to feel uneasy about his abnormal behavior. She carried the plate of chicken and noodles back over to the table and sat down. She brushed the hair from his face as he sat on the couch with Hayate on his lap and a book lying on the dog. "Hungry?"

He huffed, the notion of having to be fed like a child was humiliating. No matter who was doing it. "I'm useless. I can't even eat on my own."

"You have to take your medication with food, doctor's orders." She reminded him.

He saw her look of guilt. Where was the reassuring man he had been before his surgery? Why couldn't he muster the words 'It will be fine' from his mouth now? "Sorry, I appreciate all you're doing for me."

Riza nodded. She wasn't sure if she was worried for no reason. He seemed distant, but Roy was a rather moody individual. It wasn't surprising he was depressed right now or even irritable. He was having a hard time coping with this and she only could be with him at night, with their Colonel on the sidelines it was imperative that she go back to work. She speared a piece of chicken with her fork and turned to look at his less than enthusiastic face as he opened his mouth and pulled the meat off with his teeth.

Dinner lasted for about ten minutes, which was longer than she thought it would take for him to get angry about his feeding time. She gave him an understanding nod when he shook his head that he had had enough and then reached for the pills. She surprised him by kissing him before moving on to his medication. "You'd tell me if something was wrong, right?"

"Just in a lot of pain." He gave her a weak smile and looked at the handful of pills she had ready for him. For a man who had no problems trying to kill his liver with alcohol, he was inherently suspicious of narcotics. He had drank himself into a stupor a few times, blacking out and waking up on Hughes's couch with no recollection of the previous night. That scared him. It was more than just a matter of not knowing where he was but exactly  _what he did_. He knew what he was capable of and without the mental power to restrain himself he worried that one day he'd go to far. He knew he would be in agony if he didn't accept the pills in her hand and opened his mouth once more to let her gently place them on his tongue for him.

She watched him swallow, then held the teacup to his lips and watched the liquid drain out of the cup rather quickly. "Do you want something else to drink?"

"Yeah, but they said that's not allowed."

She frowned and cuddled up next to him. Hayate's paws stretched out to touch her leg and he put his adorable little head back down to resume his nap. "Why are you so obsessed with this book now?"

"I don't know." It was something he wasn't used to saying. He always had an answer, it was who he was. He was confident, a leader, a commander; you never admitted your uncertainty because everyone counted on you to know what to do. However this was Riza, he could be weak with her. She never doubted him, not even when he doubted himself.

"Read me something from it." She requested. It was nagging at her, why was he obsessed with a book based on the foundations of a religion he didn't believe in. She watched him flip through the pages and land on one that made him smile.

" _Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate_  " He read. "Maybe I'll have that made into a sign for the office."

She knew he was reading it in the original language and thus taking his time to translate and digest the poem. His brilliant mind, able to master languages with ease, just like he did with everything else. She, however, didn't speak the language even though she enjoyed the sound of it rolling of his tongue. "It depends on what it means."

"Abandon all hope, ye who enter here." He said and Hayate whined as soon as he finished. He looked up and saw Riza's eyes and then closed the book. "Just a joke. Nobody will know what it means."

"It's hardly a joke." She couldn't believe how he could have taken a turn for the worse. "Roy, talk to me. What's going on with you?"

"Just a realization that hit me after I woke up. That this..." He raised his hands. "Is all my doing. My hell for misleading everyone."

"Misleading us?"

"Everyone is supporting me because I've convinced you all that I'm the man who is going to change the country." He looked at the book, it's title glistening on the front of it in gold letters. Gold...another taboo. "Inferno. What an appropriate name for hell for me. I'm no less flawed than the people I aim to overthrow. Who am I to judge them?"

She couldn't believe he was sitting here saying this. Roy struggled with his demons, but not to the point where he was willing to surrender to them and forgo his penance. He didn't believe himself a good man, but he believed that his ideals were. Those dreams needed to be brought to fruition before they accepted the judgement that they knew would be waiting for them. This was too soon, this was not him.

"Pride...thinking I was above everyone, above the sins that make us human." Roy said and ran his finger over the edges of the book. "Greed and envy, go hand in hand with my rise to the top and sloth for not even doing the job I already have. Wanting everything under my control, needing a moniker and watch to be better than teh average alchemist. A glutton for booze. Wrath, well you've seen that first hand...my rage, probably takes a very close second to my arrogance. Then there is lust...for you."

That one stung. "Is that all it is? Lust?"

"I love you but I can't, or won't, allow us to be together. Instead we lie, deceive and live like this...in sin. We deny our relationship, we lie to our friends, we break the rules." He added softly. "We know it's wrong, but indulge anyway. Just like my alchemy...I knew it was wrong and yet that power...the bloodlust when I want to use it to destroy someone who threatens my world...a double edged sword that one."

She was speechless. She was used to hearing interesting statements flow from his mouth when he got thoughtful, but nothing like this. No one that would hurt her like this. He wasn't himself. "Do you remember anything from your surgery? What is going on with you?"

"I've always hated myself, I just never allowed my mind to really digest why. Here is is though, all in one simple book." He sighed. "Pride, my downfall. It lands me in the coldest pit of hell with the betrayers. The circle for treachery. How, fitting. I took a vow to protect my country and serve it's leader, yet I killed our own citizens and now I plot against the Fuhrer. I could have just stopped you know, stopped killing them. Why didn't I? Instead I did the job and now I look to blame someone else for my actions. Like Kimblee said, I put on this uniform and at no point was it not clear what was expected of me. Nobody forced me to become a State Alchemist, my damned pride wouldn't allow me to be just a normal soldier. I wanted that title, that watch, that fame. I wanted it and nobody but me is at fault for that."

"Roy..." She gripped his arm and bit her lip. He was genuinely scaring her as he stared across his living room at the flickering fire in the fireplace. This was not him. He could never avoid looking her in the eye this long. Shame was one thing, but these were statements of conviction. He would look her in the eye if he really believed it. Instead he stared into the fire, lost or maybe envisioning his fate. "Tell me what you remember from your operation. I've known you for half your life and this has never been something we have talked about. Roy, what do you remember?"

"I remember being cold during surgery, I don't remember much else. A cool air circling me, a deep sense of fear." He tapped the book with his pinkie. "It's why I had to read this again. The greatest sin, is Pride. It's what cast an angel from heaven and into the ice at the coldest darkest pit of hell. The furthest from God's love. The cool air, I was frozen there without so much as a voice or ability to move. I've never been so terrified in my life. It's a glimpse of my future...my eternity "

"You need some rest." She tried to take the book from him and instead he flipped open to the front where he had made some notes. "Come to bed. Please."

"King Soloman's work, a much older text, seems to be a little more definitive on my opinion of myself. Funny that I wrote it in here originally because I attributed it to Bradley." He ran his finger down the list written on the inside of the book. "  _A proud look, a lying tongue, hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked plots, feet that are swift to run into mischief, a deceitful witness that uttereth lies, him that soweth discord among brethren._ "

"Please stop." She begged and he remained distant, simply talking out his own self-condemning sentence.

"I bought this after Ishval. I read it and saw a story of a man's travels through hell. An author who places his political rivals where they belong. I saw the sins and looked at my contemporaries and judged them. At the time, I was only starting on my journey I thought I was coming out of hell not plotting my course to it. However now I can look back and see how wrong I was. I close my eyes and..." He swallowed hard. "I see Hughes. He's my guide, pointing out my failings and escorting me to my final resting place among the backstabbers. I don't want to sleep, not when I know what's waiting for me in the darkness. He's there, waiting for me and I can't face him."

"Then I'll stay up with you." She said and wrapped her arms around him, letting her tears fall into his shoulder and closing her eyes as he opened his book again.

"Why? With what I just told you you should be reconsidering everything."

"I told you I would follow you...even into Hell." She sat up and put her hand on his chin, forcing him to look into her eyes as tears began to fill the edges. "I'll drag you back out of it if I have to."


	4. Faced With That Truth Which Seems a Lie

_The Inferno_

**Chapter 4**

'Faced With That Truth Which Seems a Lie'

* * *

Riza poured her fifth cup of coffee that morning and glanced at the clock. Still two more hours until lunch. She adjusted the strap on the sling and put a spoonful of sugar into her drink and allowed her mind to wander away from the mundane forms that had piled up in her absence. The rest of the was occupied with their own work and without the Colonel to supervise, it was oddly quiet. Sadly, that was probably her biggest issue since the lack of noise was allowing her eyes to slowly shut and consider dosing off. She barely got any sleep last night, even after Roy finally nodded off, as she was left to think through everything he had dropped in her lap.

She didn't blame him for how he delivered the statements. An eloquent and charismatic speaker most of the time, anyone who didn't know him close enough would be surprised that he was capable of just speaking his mind. That's exactly what it was, an outpouring of thoughts he was thinking without filter or consideration of how they would be received. They were never supposed to be heard, they were his thoughts, and for him to actually share them with you was a sign of trust. It also meant, just like his signature flames, that you'd be lucky to emerge from the aftermath without being singed.

She was more upset by his feelings, this overwhelming guilt and confusion about his goal that just seemed completely out of place. He was shaken but determined when he went in to be tended to by the surgical team and when he came out he was distant and lost. She heard of people having a brush with death and suddenly changing their lives, but this wasn't some life threatening procedure. What the hell happened in there?

"Riz?"

Riza turned and looked at Havoc as he leaned against the counter where they housed the coffee pot and smiled. "I'm fine."

Jean Havoc could see from the dark circles under her eyes and that she had not had much sleep in the past week. She was back to work too soon and nobody would have been upset if she took the week off. However this was Riza Hawkeye, and she did not miss work. "Really? You just put five scoops of sugar in your coffee and have been staring at the motivational poster on the wall for about five minutes."

Riza closed her eyes and groaned. "I haven't been sleeping well."

"You don't say." Jean cocked his head and took the coffee away from her and started making her a new drink. "We are here to help, you know. We're capable of handling things if you want to recover."

"No." She shook her head. "I'm fine."

Havoc put the mug in her hand and whispered, "You're making sure you get that wound treated right?"

"Yes. I go to the infirmary and have the bandage replaced and the healing process monitored,  _mother_." She said and Jean gave her a grin.

"Ok. Just checking."

She looked up as the door swung open and the Elrics arrived, at least her worries about the office being to quiet could be put to rest. She smiled, the boys were worried about Mustang and her and they stayed close to HQ, helped with some of the staff duties and even offered to drop off 'get well soon kittens' to Roy's apartment. Seeing Mustang injured, possibly taken out of commission, was a shock to them all. She was sure that these two were the main reason he came to visit before the surgery. He wanted them to see that he was a long way from being defeated and wasn't going to abandon them, not than any of them would ever admit to any of that. Well, perhaps these two could go check up on him and spark something familiar in him. Certainly he wouldn't discuss these matters with Ed! Ed seemed to be the one person who would handle Roy in a foul mood and somehow throw it right back at him, just like Hughes used to. That was the real medicine Roy needed, not the Hughes in his mind but the one telling him he was missing out on life. Ed...would have to do.

"So how's the Colonel?" Al's chipper voice asked.

"Cranky." Riza replied.

"Hey, any way we can go talk to him?" Ed asked.

Riza raised her eyebrows, everyone else was surprised as well as Havoc almost dropped his cigarette and Breda choked a little on his sandwich. "Sure Ed. If you promise to make sure Hayate gets walked. I went over this morning to make sure he gets out, but I'm sure he'd appreciate another break." She was proud of herself for that one, being as tired as she was. It gave her an excuse for leaving Mustang's place in the morning in case someone would question her. So sad that that was the height of her accomplishments for the day.

"Great! I want to talk to him about that bone reconstruction procedure. He mentioned it when we saw him before he left for the hospital, we're really interested in it!" Ed rubbed his hands together. "It's one thing to create bone from scratch but to repair a living tissue like that with so many variables is impressive."

"That's going to go over well." Havoc mumbled. That was probably akin to trying to pet a bear you just shot four times and missed all it's vital organs.

"Well it's not like he has anything else to do." Ed shrugged.

"That's true. Falman, the Colonel is doing a lot of reading and is going to run out of material soon." Hawkeye saw the man's eyes light up eager to help make their leader feel better. Perhaps while she was on a roll of productivity she'd tackle another obstacle. At this rate, she was going to reward herself with a nap at lunch. "He's been reading T _he Inferno_ by Dante perhaps you can find him the other books in the series?"

"Would he rather us find books that are actually relevant to today's Aerugo?" Breda asked. "We could help quiz him on current events."

"Quiz him?" She asked and paused as she was about to hand Roy's address to Ed. She could just feel her momentum coming to a halt as the fog of confusion obscured her focus again. She was really going to have to consider Madam Christmas's offer to watch over Roy for a night so she could get some much needed rest. This situation was enough to wear out anyone and she was dealing with sleep deprivation and a injury her body was begging to recover from.

"Since the Prince is coming to town next month for treaty talks." Breda said and saw her reaction. He assumed it wasn't a coincidence he was reading Aerugian literature, that maybe he had a briefing before he went into the hospital. He apparently was wrong.

Havoc frowned. "They didn't tell you?"

"Tell me what?" Riza asked. Sure she was the one in charge of the office while Mustang was on leave, but she hadn't exactly been in the office much. She felt that creeping sense of dread return and her stomach lurched as her gut instinct told her that none of this was coincidental.

"We're going to be protective detail for Prince Claudio on his visit." Havoc wondered why the information hadn't been passed to her yet. They had received all the itineraries and pre-planning information after Mustang left to go to the hospital two days ago. They had all assumed that he had made his rounds that day, checking in with his superiors and giving the go ahead to allow the team to start this without him. Riza's posture told him that that was not the case. "It was in the works prior to the Colonel's injury."

"So the hijacker..." she swallowed hard. If plans of their participation in this bodyguard duty were leaked, it would explain what happened on the train. "Disabled our Colonel prior to an unprecedented visit from a foreign dignitary."

"Our Colonel  _and_  our sharpshooter." Havoc said. "We've reached the same conclusion."

Ed looked at them, he had remained silent as he really wasn't in the loop to begin with on Politics. He was brought in on that train hijacking because...well that's what he did. He didn't know this went deeper than a solitary incident but clearly that wasn't the case. "Mustang has the job to protect this guy when they knew how badly he was injured?"

"He's a Colonel, Ed." Havoc said. "Standard operating procedure for an officer of that rank is to delegate."

"If the Flame Alchemist isn't ready to come back..." Breda frowned, "Then the duty falls to you big guy. Mustang can still be in charge, but if he won't be able to take action himself than he's going to have to order you to do it for him."

"He just had surgery!" Al exclaimed. "His hands won't be mended by then! There has to be someone else that can do this job!"

Breda folded his hands and leaned back in his chair. He wondered why nobody had been sent in to cover for Mustang while he was on leave. He glanced at Hawkeye who seemed lost in thought, the wave of realization that these events were tied together hit her when she was already so worn down. "Nobody with a reputation like Mustang's and, to be honest, yours Ed. Amestris is built upon the belief that our military superiority is imposing enough to keep this country safe. I think the higher ups feel that now, more than ever, they have to prove that by showing that Mustang can't be sidelined. Giving this job to someone else would show a weakness."

Hawkeye cleared her throat. This was much more than that. This was setting up their Colonel to be a scapegoat if the Prince met with any harm while on Amestris soil. This news, coupled with his post-operative mental state, was enough to convince her that  _nothing_  was coincidence. Not the train incident. Not the timing of the visit. Not the way Roy was thinking after that operation. She needed help and she saw from the looks Havoc and Breda were giving her that she didn't need to ask for it. She just needed to tell them the truth, which in this situation, meant admitting that she had their boss were much more than co-workers. "Don't tell the Colonel just yet. He doesn't need to rush coming back."

"I'll find him those books." Falman said and left.

Ed looked to Hawkeye and saw the concern written all over her face. She might have a load of work to keep her occupied, but it didn't mean he and Al couldn't report back to her about the Colonel. "We'll go check in on the Colonel and keep him busy. Don't worry about him."

Havoc chuckled. "He's going to be so happy."

"I'll give you a key since he can't open the door with his hands bandaged." The Elrics visiting would put Roy on the defensive and she doubted he would be so 'honest' with them regarding his thoughts. She hoped their questions regarding alchemy and his surgery would start him thinking again. Either way, the result would be that he would have to stop reading for at least the duration of their visit. That would be a victory. Riza rummaged through her purse and Ed waved her off.

"I'll open it with alchemy. Don't worry."

"This keeps getting better and better." Havoc mumbled. "We're going to end up with another broken alchemist."

* * *

_He waited for the heavy fog to lift as he stood there on that hallowed ground. The dampness hung in the air and he could hear the whispers in the shadows as he subdued the feeling of dread and fear that threatened to overtake him. He took deep breaths and felt in his pockets for his gloves. He knew they wouldn't be there._

" _Hey Roy, wanna see pictures of my beautiful daughter?"_

_Just like before, Maes Hughes's voice came from a glow in the fog and he walked towards him. His best friend was his guide through this hell and without him he'd remain lost in dense fog that covered Central Cemetery in this early hour. He knew his way through the cemetery all too well, not because he visited often, but because he memorized every step he ever took in it. He wanted to remember each agonizing step, the cold stones, the dying flowers and the soggy ground beneath his feet. The smell of freshly dug soil and the taste of tears as he let them roll down his face. The sounds of a little girl screaming for her Daddy and a twenty one gun salute to send a fallen hero on his way. He memorized every step he took after that and the etching of Maes Hughes's name and dates of birth and death might as well have been carved into the backs of his eyelids._

" _Roy! Quit moping and come look at her! Look at how much she's grown!"_

_The glow was now a human, a human he knew well. His best friend and guide, his very own version of Virgil. "I know."_

" _Thanks for getting her all that stuff for her birthday. You know Gracia's got to be careful living on just my pension."_

" _Yeah." Roy nodded and walked over to the grave site and looked down at Hughes sitting with his back against the stone like it was a lounge chair. A perfectly crisp and detailed imaged emerged in front of his face, a picture of a little girl in front of her birthday cake blowing out the candles, seconds before she announced she wished she could have her Daddy back for her birthday. "She wants her father. That's what she asks for for her birthday and I took you from her."_

" _That was the job." Hughes looked up at him and frowned. "Don't try and take that away from me, I died a hero."_

" _It should have been me." Roy closed his eyes. "It should have been me they put in the ground. You had so much to live for."_

_Hughes stood and put the picture in his pocket. "You have to let that go. We knew the risks Roy, I knew damned well what I was getting myself into. Right now we need to get you out of here."_

_Roy looked around the cemetery and sighed. "That's right, death would be too kind."_

" _This hell is in you." Hughes said and cocked his head. "Nowhere else."_

_Roy sighed. "Then let's get this journey over with."_

" _You don't quite grasp what this is, do you?" Hughes asked. "This isn't Hell, Roy. It's your mind trying to help you understand the Truth."_

" _Well it would be easier if this took place in Central Library then because I know my way around there very well."_

" _Don't get me wrong, this place can consume you." Maes said and looked at the picture of Elicia cutting her cake. "The torture you see is very much a part of your psyche. The sins, all things you have attributed to yourself. Your final resting place among the traitors where you have chosen to cast yourself into. This is your Hell."_

" _The fact that you're here giving me the guided tour...well I doubt that God is really that cruel. You're the one who doesn't belong here."_

" _Well clearly you forget I was in Ishval too. You forget I turned away and ignored that a fellow officer was murdered right in front of my eyes. I killed Heathcliff, I didn't hesitate. No, I have sinned too." Maes sighed. "This isn't about me though. I'm gone, I can't contribute anything else to this world. But you can. So maybe you should stop dwelling on the sins and circles of Hell and remember that there are two more books to the Divine Comedy and an amazing woman who you have yet to marry waiting for you."_


	5. Through me you Enter into the City of Woes

_The Inferno_

Chapter 5

**_'Through me you Enter into the City of Woes'_ **

* * *

Roy woke up from the dream in a sweat and sat up quickly as his heart raced and the room swirled around him. Hayate, who had been lounging on him just moments earlier, flipped over backwards onto the couch beside him. The dog quickly righted himself and shook off his own post-nap stupor, Roy was not so lucky. He felt detached from everything and he just chose to blame the drugs he was on. He looked at his hands and wondered how he was going to take a shower without using them, he wanted to rid his skin of the sticky film reminder of his nightmare.

Hughes. Each time he closed his eyes he found himself in that cemetery again and each time he saw the pictures of the little girl who would grow up without her father. So why was he telling him this time that the Hell wasn't real and there was something beyond it waiting for him? Was it because he refused to leave that fog and continue his journey? Was he that coward cowering in his tent again who needed the coaxing from his friend to just get the job done? He didn't deny his sins but when it came time to accepting that final judgement he found himself unable to willingly surrender to it.

He looked at the book, still open to the page he was reading when he dozed off. The second circle of Hell where those who allowed lust to override their reason were blown about by a tempest. Never to rest, condemned to an eternity of being whipped and thrown about in a terrible storm because they lived their lives allowing their emotions to do the same. He felt that storm inside him, that destructive vortex bandying about his will and desires. Was that why Hughes mentioned Riza? Was Maes telling him to get a wife because he saw how this sin was eroding him?

Hayate nudged him and Roy looked down at the dog as he wagged his tail and climbed onto his lap. He hugged him, putting his chin on the pups's head as he tried to wiggle and lick his face. He glanced up at the clock and realized it was time for another dose of pills and he reluctantly placed a bookmark between the pages and flipped the book closed. Roy looked up as he heard a knock on the door and Hayate got up to go over and sniff under it to see who was visiting.

"Hey Colonel! Rise and shine!"

It was Ed. What the hell was he doing here? Roy looked around and then sniffed at the shirt he had been wearing for two days and frowned. He smelled awful.

"We're coming in because you're useless and can't open the door."

That damned kid! Roy grunted as he heard the lock being turned. Useless? He could still put his foot in that kid's ass and kick him to the curb. He managed to stand up just as Ed let himself in and Hayate greeted the guests. "What the hell are you doing here?"

"Oh, sorry...was letting myself in your home during your recovery from a traumatizing injury...rude?" Ed looked at the scruffy alchemist in his pajamas as he walked over to intercept them. The man stopped in his tracks and stared at him not appreciating the reenactment of the first time they had met. He sniffed at him and snorted, "You smell awful. Do you need us to take you outside and hose you off?"

Roy raised his hand to point to the door to tell him to get out, but his bandaged hand just waved around pathetically as he gestured. Ed, meanwhile, had already made it over to his refrigerator to look for something to eat. Telling him that he wasn't in the mood for guests would seem weak considering he never bothered to be that considerate to a double amputee child. So he mumbled, "Help yourself to whatever you want."

"Why do you only have milk in here?" Ed demanded as he looked in the refrigerator.

"Broken bones need Calcium." Roy swept his pills off the counter and into his cupped hand, making a show of it. He tossed the pills into his mouth and swallowed, regretting the action immediately. A few stuck together and lodged in his throat and he let loose a sad cough before grabbing the glass of water with both hands and lifting it to his lips. He tried to chug it, hoping to dislodge the pills in his throat by force and ended up with some of it dribbling down his chin. He slapped the glass down, wiped his mouth off with his bandaged and returned to the couch. They were on a mission and he wouldn't be rid of them until they got what they wanted, the sooner that happened the sooner he could be at peace to suffer the consequences of taking the pills on an empty stomach. He sat down and Al joined him, Hayate crawled onto Al's lap and the two of them nearly shoved him off the couch.

"So Colonel, we were hoping you'd tell us more about the alchemy they used on you during surgery. Repairing bone...sounds like bio-alchemy and possible help towards our goal." Al said and gently pet Hayate's belly.

"I didn't talk with the man who was in charge of it." Roy looked down at his hands. "He talked to me to reassure me he knew what he was doing, but we didn't discuss it."

Ed came over with a left over bowl of chicken and noodles. Since that day on the train, he couldn't help but see Mustang in a new light; one where he sacrificed his most precious asset to save...well his most precious asset. How he had never seen it before made him feel naïve and blind. So they owed it to Hawkeye to ease her worries about Mustang while she was at work. He wasn't going to tell her that he was trying to choke to death on pills or drown himself with a glass of water. "Did they take the bone out and then put it back in?"

"Or piece together everything and rejoin it within the hand?" Al asked.

"I wasn't watching and they gave me drugs to avoid remembering." He said and watched Ed wolf down the left overs. "I doubt he'd be all that interested in discussing it with me, anymore than I'd discuss Flame Alchemy with him."

"Did they tell you anything? The guy's name?" Ed asked. He was disappointed Mustang wasn't going to be much help but he couldn't be too upset with him. He saw the pill bottles on the counter in the kitchen and didn't need a medical degree to figure out the guy was going through a lot right now. Still, Mustang had no problem barging into the Rockbell's home when he was recovering from his injuries after the transmutation gone wrong, and he felt no remorse in regards to invading Mustang's apartment. No problem at all.

"No." Roy held out his right hand and stared at it. "I don't think it should be healing this fast though. I can't explain it, but the grinding feeling from having a jumbled mess of bone bits in my hand is now gone but I shouldn't be feeling this good about it."

"Colonel, you're not supposed to be moving your hand." Al chided.

"I need to know." He said and wiggled his fingers. "I just had to."

"What's this?" Ed asked and picked up his book. His curiosity was piqued in the office and he wanted to know if he was hiding anything about this Prince Claudio visit. It seemed like something Mustang would do. "Did you find another book on Flame Alchemy?"

"No." Roy snorted. "It's fiction."

Ed looked around for somewhere to sit and realized Mustang's apartment was sparse on furniture. He finally gave up looking for a seat and went over to the man's desk and sat down. He looked at a picture of Mustang and Hughes and quickly returned his eyes to the book. He opened the book and flipped a few pages before saying, "What language is this?"

"Aerugian."

"You speak that too?" Al asked and played with Hayate's ears.

"Yes." Roy said and kept his answers simple. He didn't want company now and he didn't want to tell bedtime stories either. "I'm sure there is a translated version you can pick up from the library. If you want, when I'm feeling better, we can have a book club meeting and discuss it all you want. Right now, I'm tired and my hands hurt like hell. I'm going to bed."

Al was about to ask if he could walk Hayate, but as soon as the dog heard the word 'bed' he jumped off his lap and trotted into the bedroom. He saw the dog leap up on the bed and curl up in a ball. "Ok, we'll come back tomorrow after we go to the library. I want to know more about the bone alchemy."

"And I'm interested in this book. " Ed wondered why Mustang would suddenly choose now to read an Auregian book. Did he know about the Prince's visit? The team didn't seem to think he knew anything about it, but it was a weird coincidence. It was also weird that a Colonel wouldn't know about something of this level of importance. He looked over at him, the man seemed...off. Perhaps the drugs were doing a number on him, but this disheveled mess was hardly what he was anticipating when they came here. "So get some sleep and be ready to talk about what we find tomorrow."

"I really don't want to talk about it." Roy growled.

"Well too damned bad." Ed grinned and closed the book. "Your hands are busted so I can piss you off without getting my hairs singed. I'm taking advantage of this opportunity while I can."

"We don't have anyone else to talk with about medical alchemy." Al shrugged. "Maybe if we talk about it you'll remember what happened?"

Roy sighed. "Doubtful. However I know better than to pretend I'm not here when you show up again tomorrow. You'll either let yourself in or holler in the hallway until you get me evicted."

"Well, it's settled. We'll see you tomorrow." Ed smiled. That gave them all night to read and learn the material they needed. Something was weird about Mustang. This wasn't the same guy who was on top of that train. He wasn't even the guy who checked in on them before he checked into the hospital. So who the hell was he?

* * *

Breda sat down at the table and looked at Hawkeye as she tried to take the books from his hands. "Why are we really getting these for Mustang?"

She could feel them all looking at her: Falman with that slightly lifted brow, Fuery with his eyes wide, Havoc with that casual cock of the head and Breda with that intense focus.

"We know you're Elizabeth." Havoc said and saw her breathing stop. "Riza, we've always known."

She finally took a deep breath and realized that she couldn't tackle this on her own. Too much was going on. "He's been different since the surgery. He can be moody, but never like this. There's a passion in his moods and he's never been so resigned to a fate before. He's obsessed with this damned book and in every fiber of my being I know something is wrong. Something happened in that operating room."

"Do you think that the stress and medication might have something to do with this?" Breda asked. "Perhaps he was informed of the Aerugo visit and the thought was in the back of his mind and it somehow spiraled out of control?"

She shook her head. "I know Roy Mustang. I know how he thinks and this is not him. He doesn't allow his mind to be seduced by suggestion, he analyses everything and picks it apart like an alchemist. He can be obsessive when he's doing research but this is not him processing anything. It's allowing the reading material to go unquestioned and accepting it as truth. "

"What kind of drugs do they have him on?" Falman asked and she pulled a piece of paper out of her uniform to hand to him.

"What exactly is he obsessing on?" Breda asked

"Hell." She said and looked away. She felt like she was betraying him, but she was over her head with this and she needed help. "How he's guilty of all these sins and mislead us. He's reading that book in it's original text, savoring the words like he just wants to endure the pain they're experiencing. "

"Well there are two more books you know." Falman said. " _Purgetorio_  and  _Paradiso_."

"I have to get him out of Hell first." She said. "And he doesn't want to leave it."

Havoc watched the team confer on this and pulled Hawkeye off to the side and whispered. "Make him. Like you always do. Go in there and call him an idiot and make him listen to you. We've read the summary of this trilogy, you know. How Dante is obsessed with some chick named Beatrice, his idea of perfection and beauty. She's in heaven waiting to show him around. We're pretty sure if Mustang is Dante, then you're Beatrice. So why don't you go yell at him for getting himself in trouble and tell him to get his shit together?"

"Are we that obvious?" She asked, a tinge of red coloring her cheeks.

"You should see how he looks at you." Havoc grinned. "The way he looks at anyone else who looks at you too."

Riza turned as Breda stood up and held up the book. "Let's talk about how you can use this book against him."

* * *

She saw his blood shot eyes and greasy hair and knew he had spent another day not leaving the couch. He was barely sleeping, wasn't bathing and she knew he wasn't eating or taking his medication. She went over and pulled the book from his hands and threw it on the table. "Damned alchemists, you are so quick to obsess on books and ignore the world going on around you."

He felt her hands on his cheeks as she took his face into her hands. "Riza..."

"I've been reading this book as well." She said and his eyes flickered to hers and his eyebrows lifted a little. He was waiting for her to agree with his assessment. If there was one thing that would snap him out of his thoughts it was saying..."You're wrong."

He blinked away the blurry vision of exhaustion as a surge of emotion helped him overcome the mental and sensory sluggishness thanks to sleep deprivation. Wrong?

"I honestly don't see how you can draw any parallels between you and anything in this book." She said and was glad to see him look almost appalled at her implications. Good.

He watched her stand up straight and scoffed, "What?"

"Take a bath, eat and take and your meds and we'll discuss it." She said and saw that flicker of surprise come over his features. Finally, she saw a glimpse of Roy again after days of him hiding off in the distance. She was glad she asked for help, she was being too kind with him. She had to make him defensive, then these thoughts would have to retreat into the background.

"I can't be wrong." He said and watched her go to the kitchen. "It's a personal interpretation of a work of fiction, not some scientific research. There is no wrong."

She looked over her shoulder at him and said, "Your own words...'it's a work of fiction' so why are you using it as a standard to measure yourself by? Have you found religion? Is this what this is about?"

"No..." He looked to the book and couldn't explain why he was so drawn to it. Why these sins seemed to be the only distinguishable things in the mists of his foggy mind. "It may be fiction but it's still left to the reader to determine what they take away from it, just like any novel. I'm utilizing it to see how I've been so self-absorbed that I never considered how my flaws are so much more..."

"You're wrong." She repeated. "So get in the bath and I'll make you some food. When you're done eating I'll tell you why."

He sat up and looked at her, his mouth open and confused by the implication that he could misinterpret something so clear. "Riza..."

"Roy. You're taking that damned book out of context, looking at only one portion through the eyes of a man who wanted to reinforce the principles of his religion. A man who was exiled, who had political motivations for writing this and you're so absorbed in this tale you're not looking at the facts. You're looking at the story when you always criticize the facts first before beginning to digest the content within. You need to take this apart just like you do everything, because looking at something as a whole is not how you think. You break down the structure into it's most basic elements and then come back to understand the compound as a whole. So why aren't you doing that now?"

Roy blinked. That made sense and he had to agree with her. He couldn't offer an explanation as to why he just accepted this as truth.

"You're also forgetting that there are two more books and the narrator travels to purgatory and heaven as well. He is on a journey...he's not stopping anywhere to stay. Dante is on a journey and it's supposed to be about enriching himself and coming back to a life that he comprehends better. Not letting the journey consume him."

Roy watched her lean over the couch, Hayate's tail thumped on his leg as she rubbed his belly. She sounded like Hughes.

"Dante meets with Beatrice in heaven. The woman he loved, the woman who inspired him to write. A woman who he could never have." She watched Roy's dark eyes lift to her, that loving look he reserved for her alone. "If Hughes is your guide...then I'm sure he's painted some ridiculous picture of me. I'm not a saint, I'm a sinner like you and I walk beside you in this journey. Through our innocence days of kisses and coded love notes...to now when you almost threw yourself off a train to save my life. I love you Roy Mustang, and unlike Beatrice I have no intention of letting you walk a path through hell alone. I am not waiting for you in a better place because my place will always be by your side. I am and will always be yours."

He stood up and moved to kiss her, overwhelmed by her words but a finger was placed on his pursed lips before he could make contact with her.

"You smell horrible. Go take a bath, change and try again."

He heard Hayate jump off the couch and trot across the oak floor to join his Mom in the kitchen and he watched her smile down at her faithful dog. He glanced down at the book on the couch and stared at the cover. He wished he could explain to her why he was drawn to it. He was the moth and it was the flame and it continued to singe him every time he touched it. So why couldn't he pry his eyes away from the text within?


	6. With Words Unshackled From the Rhymes

 

 

_The Inferno_

Chapter 6

**With Words Unshackled From the Rhymes**

* * *

Roy wrapped his arms around Riza's waist and buried his head in the crook of her neck as she finished preparing dinner. It had been too long since he had appreciated the smell and feel of her and he couldn't comprehend how he went so long without it. He squeezed her and enjoyed the moment as Hayate sniffed for scraps around their feet. "I'm sorry. I don't understand why I said those things yesterday. I love you, I might question why you're here with me but I...I don't know why I said that. I haven't been myself. "

She ran her hand over his exposed forearm and was glad he smelled better in addition to sounding more like himself. She looked down at the stitches on his hand and was thrilled to see they weren't infected or dribbling pus. Somehow he at least managed to tend to his wounds, or Hayate did when he fell asleep. "I'm worried about losing you Roy. More than I was on that train or waiting on you in the hospital."

"I can't explain it. I just can't focus on anything else but these sins and circles of hell. I try, I try to think of something else and I'm unable to focus. It's the only clear thing in my mind right now." He took a deep breath and tried to clamp his eyes down tighter. "I feel like I'm lost in my own head. That's the best explanation I can give you."

"Then we keep talking." She said softly and caressed his arm some more. She should have known it would take something extreme like sweeping him off his feet and calling him an idiot to shock him out of his mindset, but she had been so scared of losing him that she was frozen in place. "We need to start you thinking again. Whatever happened to you in that hospital has been like a bag over your head."

"I was awake during all of it." He said simply.

"And they erased your memories after." She reminded him. "Which is what has me worried. This isn't like you, you don't obsess on things like this. I know how you think, we've been together for a long time."

"We have. You've never given up on me." He smiled as he recalled a time in his apprenticeship when he was struggling with some concepts in his studies. Riza had stayed up with him, denying herself sleep she so desperately needed to help him. That was the first night she had fallen asleep on him, the first night he had wrapped a blanket around her skinny body and put his arm around her as she slept. Riza was a problem solver, she could see ways to fix things that he just couldn't. She fixed things with baling twine while he tried to alchemize rope. She was incredible.

"I never will."

"Did you make me a cheese and bacon omelet?" He asked as she served up his meal without twisting out of his embrace.

"And cinnamon sugar toast." She pushed another plate over and felt him affectionately squeeze her in a silent thank you.

"See, this is the kind of food they serve in heaven." He said and placed a kiss on her cheek. "You are a saint."

"To you and the dog." She said as he rounded the counter and sat on the stool then fumbled with the fork. To her amazement he was able to flex his fingers enough to hold it and shovel food into his mouth. "Your hand is working."

"Mmm..." He hummed as he chewed the first bite of the delicious breakfast creation. "It's the one that was shot."

"Alchemy...can mend tissue not ignore the healing process." She said. "That's not equivalent exchange."

"It's bothering me too." He said and looked over at his crushed hand and moved the fingers a little. "The bones, that repair falls under reconstruction. The tendons I think were reattached surgically. The swelling and tissue damage, crushed blood vessels, joints and skin...I can't explain that. Something that should take several surgeries and months of healing came out of the hospital already progressed past that."

She felt queasy, a feeling in the pit of her stomach that everything came back to those hours he was alone with the surgical team. What the hell happened behind those closed doors? His hands were healing too quickly, the Elrics were suspicious about that as well. Then there was his lack of mental clarity, even in his worst moments he could still be counted on to think and react. "I think they did something to you."

He looked at his hand and poked at the omelet. "Just because I'm interested in reading doesn't mean someone brain washed me. I already owned this book, I just felt the need to come back to it now that I have some down time. I think it's a stretch to think they'd put my hands back together and disable my mind instead."

She went to the couch and sat down, picked up his book and setting it on her lap. Unfortunately she felt like that was exactly what happened.

* * *

"What are you guys working on?" Ed leaned over the table when he saw maps and books all over the conference table. His golden eyes shone bright as he took in all the treasures and hovered close enough to get a whiff of the old book smell.

"A project for the Colonel." Breda replied and watched Ed snap up a drawing of the circles of Hell from T _he Inferno_. Al was leaning over the findings as well and there was little hope of prying either of them away from any of it. Good. Ed's abrasive nature and alchemist brain would be the key to pushing Mustang out of his comfort zone.

"His book huh?" Al said as he saw an Amestrian translation open on the table and leaned over to read it. He looked over at the map and several books of artwork that had been made for this epic poem, there was nothing even remotely cheerful about any of this. Perhaps he should have given him those get well kittens after all.

"So the circles are the place where the sinners go? " Ed said as his finger traced over the drawing and then his eyes shifted to some notes beside it. A translation of the sins into modern terminology. It was an impressive creation, the author went through a lot of work to lay the foundation for his masterpiece.

Falman nodded and showed Ed a book he was reading about the religion of Aerugo. "The seven deadly sins. The sins are layered by severity and within each circle those who committed those sins, tortured in a way that is befitting their crimes."

Ed sat down and read some of the notations on the side of the map. Religion. People living in fear of an afterlife like this and the religion itself gaining it's power from that fear. He didn't understand that. It clearly didn't work to deter people from sinning as this Hell was far from empty. It even put people from other religions and time frames in there, punishing them for something they had no knowledge of. "It's lovely. I'm sure the guy who dreamed up all these horrible things is a complete angel. Not some judgmental, hypocritical, twisted bastard."

Al hoped his brother wouldn't go into a diatribe regarding religion as he really didn't know where Mustang's team stood on the mater. Al understood that people needed hope, even if he didn't quite believe in that particular manifestation of hope. He looked at a list that Fuery was making and noticed something. "Look at this list of sins."

Ed shoved the map away and sighed. He looked at the notes Fuery had taken, listing reoccurring themes and names. They must have been hoping to find something that had triggered a memory for the Colonel and ergo some explanation for wanting to read the book. He cocked his head when he saw a list of the sins all in one place. One stood out among them all. "Envy. Like that guy I met at Lab 5."

"Don't forget Greed." Al said and Ed's eyes lifted to meet his. "This can't be coincidence."

"What if the homunculus are all names after sins of man?" Al ventured to put that theory out there and his brother snapped it up and ran with it.

"Ironic. Name your ultimate taboo creations after mankind's greatest flaws." Ed mumbled and looked at the list again. "This doesn't make sense."

"Any more sense than the homunculus being in that lab? Or Greed wanting to be immortal?" Al asked. "They answer to someone."

"This can't be a coincidence. Has the Colonel ever mentioned this as his favorite book?" Ed asked Havoc who was curiously looking over the list in his hand.

"I'm pretty sure his little black book of dating is his favorite." Havoc said and glanced at Breda who was deep in thought. He suspected his best friend had laid out this presentation specifically so the Elrics could eat it up and burst into Mustang's apartment again. It was no wonder those two could play chess together. Ed could get away with saying damned near anything, whereas they were still bound by military protocol to obey their commander's order to leave.

Al looked at the drawing that was on the table top and read off the sins and the individuals that would find themselves condemned to that circle of Hell. He made it to the bottom and said, "Brother, you might want to look at this: Circle eight."

Ed looked at where Al was pointing and shook his head. "Oh hell no."

"Technically, Hell _yes_." Al said and Ed rolled up the map of hell and marched out of the office. He waved a goodbye to the confused staff and followed after his brother.

* * *

"There are seven deadly sins and seven heavenly virtues." Riza said and placed her finger on Roy's lips as they parted to vocalize a protest. "If you were so corrupted by a single sin or a combination of all of them, don't you think I would have considered _that_ straying from your path? Don't you think I would have had to fulfill my promise to you?"

He stared into her eyes as she waited for his answer. Her finger left his lips and he struggled to explain why so much was on the fuzzy peripherals of his vision and his only clear view was of these sins. He didn't have an explanation and he couldn't refute her statement. She was asking him a simple question and he couldn't answer it. The one thing he did know was that he had hurt her with his words and now he was insulting her integrity by implying he was beyond salvation. "Riza...it's a stretch to say that there is anything virtuous about me."

"Did it ever occur to you that Maes was trying to help you out of Hell? That, just like in life, he was trying to help you _get to the top_?" She watched him swallow and that sad look come over him, that look that overwhelmed him every time Hughes was mentioned. "He would never haunt you Roy. You bring that upon yourself. That man believed in you and so do I. So you are going to sit here and listen to why I support and follow you, you're going to hear why I love you. If this pit you have cast yourself into is the very absence of love then a man who loves me, his friends and family and his country would never be granted access to it. You represent everything that that these people have forsaken."

There it was again, the surge of defensiveness from having to hear he was wrong. He shuffled uncomfortably and she started to run her fingers through his hair to keep him from leaving the comfort of her arms. Wrong? He looked at her smile, she knew exactly how her words would affect him and continued talking before he could make a comeback.

"You're the very opposite of pride." She stroked his fine black hair and cradled him against her chest as they laid on his couch together. "Humility. You might be the cocky Colonel but deep inside you feel like you're so unimportant, unworthy...sacrificial. Your guilt makes it impossible for pride to be your downfall. You're not proud of anything you've done, even the biggest accomplishments come with an unpleasant aftertaste. A man corrupted by pride, would be above questioning his own integrity, believing himself to be perfect and beyond reproach. "

He closed his eyes and enjoyed the feel of her fingers running through his hair. "I'm an asshole."

She tugged on his hair. "You take care of everyone around you, you work towards becoming a better man. You're confusing the man you've created for the public view with the man you really are. You're not lazy, you do nothing but work. Sloth isn't a sin of yours, maybe for Colonel Mustang who pretends to sleep so nobody sees he's a brilliant mastermind. You work overtime, skip meals and don't get enough sleep. Just like the young student who used to fall asleep with his face in his alchemy books. Intergrity and work ethic are among your greatest virtues. Dedicating yourself to this goal, a lifetime goal, is the very opposite of sloth."

"You love me. You see good in me that even I don't believe is there." He replied and looked up at her beautiful face.

"I love you because of the man you are." She said. "Not the image you want the outside world to see while you climb to the top. A man ruined by greed would want power, but you want to give power back to the people. You drink too much but I can't blame you for that. You're only human and we've done so much...but you have exercised great restraint where it comes to your alchemy. Gluttony is indulgence, temperance is control. Even when you do indulge and drink too much, you are mindful to not go so far that you can't control your power. You realized that years ago and Hughes and I both saw that in you."

They both looked to the door as a knock interrupted her. He knew that knock. Obnoxious, loud and always at the wrong time. He groaned and mumbled, "It's the Elrics. Again."

She nudged him to ask him to move. Perhaps that was enough discussion for the moment, he would need to mull over her statements in order to counter with his own objections. She'd be ready and nothing he could throw at her would make her back down. "Unless you want them to barge in here and see us like this, you best get off me."

"What is with them?" He asked. "Why do they think I'm dead if I don't answer my door? You'd think that kid would understand losing a hand wouldn't be a death sentence."

"They're a little over reactive, they're worried about you." She said and then added, "They're worried about losing you."

"Like Hughes?" Roy said and sat up. "I took him from them too."

"Now they're exclusively yours." She said and stood up as he ruffled up his hair a little. "They also enjoy talking with you and you're impossible to deal with in the office."

"I wouldn't go that far..." Roy said and she gave him a smile as she went to the door.

Riza opened the door just as Ed began to pound on it with his automail fist. "Ed, you're going to disturb the entire apartment complex."

Ed pulled back his hand and said, "I'm sorry...but we've made a discovery."

"Clearly not fucking manners." Roy's voice carried from inside the apartment.

Ed narrowed his eyes and hissed, " _Clearly_ he's feeling better."

Riza opened the door so they could both come in. She closed it behind them and made her way to the kitchen. "Can I get you something to eat?"

"Don't feed him, he'll never leave." Roy said and Ed came over to look down at him.

"I think we've figured out why you've suddenly found an interest in the _Inferno_." Al said.

Riza froze. She wasn't sure how this was going to go. Was Ed going reveal the part about Prince Claudio visit or that the whole team was concerned about his mental well being? Her fear abated as Ed smacked Mustang in the head with the rolled up poster and then unraveled it in front of his eyes. He tapped the bottom of it and said, "See this? Do you see who ends up in one of the deepest pits of Hell?"

"Alchemists." Roy read the words where Ed's finger was and leaned back and huffed. "What? Now you suddenly believe in God?"

"No. I refuse to believe this crap!" Ed snapped. "Because there is no way in Hell that I am spending eternity locked away somewhere with _you_."

"You've got to be kidding me." Roy said and finally cracked a smile for the first time in days. "That is what you find appalling? You're the one who let yourself in this afternoon and then showed up again for dinner! You probably are going to move in tomorrow at this rate. Sounds like you're on target to bring Hell on both of us _this week_!"

"This Dante has quite an imagination and seems like and entitled ass. That's what I've gathered from just from the summary and I don't even want to read the poem. " Ed snapped and turned the map around to read the punishment. "Alchemists corrupt God's work so they get an infectious disease because they are one to society? Falsifiers of metal. Worse than murderers? One tier above the devil? Are you _kidding_ me?"

Roy rolled his eyes and Ed tossed the poster on the coffee table. "Well, if it's any consolation Fulllmetal I'm sure they'll want to kick you out after you've been there for a few hours. I know I do."

Al watched as his brother went to smack the Colonel again but the man swatted the poster off the table. "It's good to see you feeling better Colonel."

"The Lieutenant helped me come to my senses." Roy looked up as Ed stood above him with his hands on his hips like he was going to make some great speech. "So what is your great discovery, Ed? That you can barge in here and get fed for free? Or are you worried about my health now?"

"This has nothing to do with you! You're worrying the Lieutenant and I don't like it!" Ed huffed and saw Mustang's face soften. Then he calmed down enough to get down to business. "Remember when we snuck into Lab 5?"

"When you let loose a serial killer who became obsessed with Hawkeye? Oh...and the whole building blew up?" Roy shrugged and casually leaned back into the couch. "Maybe."

"Too bad they couldn't have memory wiped your shitty attitude." Ed grumbled. "Envy was the name of that thing that I fought, the picture you hung up on the fridge. And that guy that kidnapped Al was Greed."

Riza perked up. That couldn't be a coincidence.

"Isn't it odd that these people were named after sins? Homonculus named after sins?" Al added.

Ed grinned as he saw a flicker of interest from Mustang. He got excited, maybe they had figured this out. "I didn't really think about it until Al saw the list of sins in the office. I was looking at the map so I didn't see it but all the sins are their own distinguishable level. Ever since that encounter in Lab 5, I haven't been able to stop thinking about everything they said. Just hints of a grand scheme, they saved me for _something_. They were worried I found out too much and the Slicer Brothers revealed information. They called me a human sacrifice. In fact, that woman said two of the sacrifices meaning Al is one too. What if...they're trying to save you or keep you out of the way too?"

Roy digested all that. Then leaned forward and said, "What list in the office?"

Al gasped. "Uh...well..."

"Everyone wants to join our book club." Ed quickly said. "Especially Falman, he's really into foreign literature."

Roy looked over to Riza who gave him an apologetic look that confirmed that she enlisted the help of the team. He wanted to be mad, but he knew that she'd never bring the others into this unless she was desperate. He had scared her. He looked back to Ed who was standing there like a dog who retrieved a bone, not sure if he was going to get a pat for a job well done or yelled at for digging in the yard. He took a deep breath and leaned back into his couch and said, "Book Club."

"Yeah." Ed said and laughed when he thought about Team Mustang gathering around the conference table some night talking about the book of the month. "Might improve morale."

"I'll take it into consideration." Roy said and looked at his hands. He was saved for something and the extent that the State went to to save him was extreme. He was certain there were more people in the higher ranks that would prefer to see his alchemy sidelined permanently; it made him dangerous and it made him stand out. All of this was too coincidental and finally he let his eyes lift and look at that book without feeling it's intoxicating pull call to him. He was an alchemist and he believed in truth, not some poetic words of a bitter man immortalized in text. "So, why don't you all fill me in on what I've been missing at work?"


	7. The Man who lies asleep will never awaken fame

 

 

 

_The Inferno_

Chapter 7

" **The Man who lies asleep will never awaken fame."**

* * *

"We're concerned about your surgery." Riza said hoping to avoid having Ed divulge the information about the upcoming peace talks. He was grinning and relaxed now, happy that he was able to help in the matter. She didn't need him getting overzealous and ruining the mood just yet.

Ed st down on the ottoman. He was worried that something did happen to Mustang in that hospital and his own experience had shown him that anything was possible. Especially with alchemy. "Look, if your memory was wiped than it's possible your brain is just trying to fill in the blanks. Maybe you do remember some things and instead of going mad trying to find out what those lost memories are your brain is making things up."

Roy shivered, a feeling of cold and vulnerability suddenly shooting through his body. It felt like deja vu. He grabbed a blanket and wrapped it around himself, assuming it was just a draft. "This is a great campfire story, but really not much more than that. If I was filling in the blanks with anything than it was probably your horrible drawings that were haunting me."

Ed saw a small grin as Mustang said it however it didn't help him shake off the ominous feeling. " _Something_ happened in there."

"Yes." Roy raised his hands. "They worked on my hands for hours."

"Why keep you awake then?" Ed asked. "What purpose did that serve? You couldn't move, could you? So if they were testing their work and asking you to flex your hands or something you couldn't do it. I know what it's like not having your nerves connected to your arm, having it physically there but unresponsive. Why have you awake for that at all?"

Roy tried hard to remember why that was the route the surgeon took. "It was a regional anesthesia to block the nerves in the hands. Less risky than a general anesthesia. I was given something else as general relaxant to make sure I didn't move the rest of my body while they were working."

"If you weren't in pain and didn't have any horrible experiences during the procedure, why give you that drug to wipe your memories at all?" Ed asked.

"Alchemists can be rather peculiar with their secrets." Roy said and both boys accepted that as an answer. It wasn't a stretch of the imagination to believe there was a alchemist that might not help someone for fear of their alchemy becoming known. "It was a procedure I wasn't even aware of and the alchemist doing the work was someone I have never met. To eliminate the possibility of the secrets getting out it's probably best that even I can't answer anything. I don't know who was in that room with me and apparently that is one of the conditions that had to be met to have this procedure done. Considering I have watched you absorb knowledge like a sponge and mimic attacks of other alchemists, I would consider that option if you were my patient as well. Precautions, protocol and paranoia, also known as standard operating procedure if you would care to read any military manuals while you are in the service."

Ed knew why he would accept those conditions, there was a promise to restore his body and of course he took it. Ed couldn't say he would have scrutinized any of it either, not when the glimmer of hope was shining in his eyes and blinding him to anything else. Still, as an alchemist, he would need to know and would pick apart at everything later to discover exactly what had been done. Until truth was found, he would never stop unless someone made sure the secrets would always be out of reach. "There is a connection here. That woman and Envy were in a lab, a government lab, and Barry and the Slicer bothers were created there too. If this man is so secret with his research, he has to be doing it _somewhere_. He has to be doing it on _someone_."

Riza swallowed hard. None of this was making her feel better. What if someone that wasn't authorized was in that room with him when he was immobilized and helpless and completely out of reach? She almost spilled hot water for the tea on her hand as panic gripped her. He was so vulnerable then and she wasn't there with him. He could have been at the mercy of some lunatic like Shou Tucker who used alchemy to create abominations. She looked at him and saw he still wasn't buying any of this and they needed to completely shock him out of his complacency. Withholding information about the upcoming peace talks was in no way protecting him. He needed to find his own way out of the darkness and if that was caused by a lack of information than he needed to know everything. He was an alchemist, he thrived on information and the absence of that was probably at the heart of his issues. She quietly added, "It's too coincidental that you want to read an Aerugian book that happens to have the seven deadly sins featured. I agree with Ed."

"What does the book being Aerugian have to do with anything?" Roy asked and looked to Riza, he could feel the tension from the Elrics as they both shuffled uncomfortably, but she was the only one he was asking. He saw it in her face, the admission of guilt. She wasn't just scared enough to ask for help, she was keeping information from him. If that wasn't enough to cause alarm, nothing would be.

"Prince Claudio of Aerugo is coming to Central in three weeks for peace talks." Riza said and saw a flash of the Roy Mustang she knew and loved come back into those eyes of his. Immediately they darted back to the book, then his hands and back to the curious Elrics who were waiting for an explosion of verbal or physical nature. He sat up straighter and cleared his throat.

"When did this happen?" Roy asked and looked at the three individuals hovering around him on the couch.

"The team got word the day you went into the hospital and assumed you had been briefed before you left for surgery." Riza answered.

"What are the details on this Prince Claudio visit?" Roy asked. "Why is he coming here now? Does this have to do with the train hijacking?"

"The visit was apparently in the works prior to that." She answered and knew what he was really asking: Was the train incident because of the Prince's plans or the cause of his desire to talk peace?

"And my team is saddled with the responsibility of keeping him alive? After one of his citizens tried to kill us on that train they hijacked? After some mercenary from Aerugo tried to kill _you_ I have to act like I care about his well being?" Roy felt the rusty gears of his mind begin to turn again and it felt good. "So not only am I physical proof that the enemy can't take down one of Amestris's human weapons, but I've also got a reason to _not_ devote myself to saving his life. In addition I am at a disadvantage because of this surgery, both physically and mentally unable to prepare for this event. You're right, this is a much more sinister story than the one I am reading."

Ed raised his eyebrows. "You think someone's setting you up?"

"I don't see what Amestris has to gain from a peace treaty with them. Aerugo supplied Ishval with weapons, constantly engages in border wars and they turn a blind eye to their trained soldiers turned mercenaries who come onto our soil. It is however a great opportunity to get the Prince into Central and take him out. If we are charged with keeping him safe, the fault lies on me if he's assassinated. They also tried to kill our best sniper, something I'm not going to forget so easily either." Roy leaned back into the couch and mulled it over.

"That would start a war." Al said and Mustang nodded.

"Best thing for the economy and the Fuhrer's hold on power. Nothing makes a country support it's leader like a war, especially when foreigners come onto our soil to start it. He would be defending our way of life and security, while also boosting the economy." Roy shook his head and looked at his hands.

"And you're..injured." Al said. "Even in a month you won't be back to full strength."

Ed put his tea cup down. "So with you recovering and heavily medicated you can't look into the security and prepare for his visit. With your hands injured you won't be able to full use your alchemy to avert an attack. If the Prince is killed...you get blamed."

"I get blamed." Roy smiled. "My choices are to go to war to salvage my honor or join Kimblee in prison. My ambitions will go up in flames."

Ed rubbed his knee. "That means this goes all the way to the top."

Roy nodded and then softly said, "It's what got Hughes killed."

Ed's eyes darted up to meet Mustang's at the mention of the man's name. It was a somber statement, but definitive. Suddenly the memories of showing Hughes his drawings in the hospital came flooding back along with the Fuhrer's surprise visit. "Bradley visited me in the hospital when I was showing Hughes my sketches. He saw Envy with his own eye and told me to leave it along. So these homunculus have ties to the military."

"Which is why they were guarding a military lab." Roy said. "I know that alchemy of this level, creating artificial humans, would have to have support from the government. There is no way that some independent alchemist could possibly get the research, funding or equipment to even begin to start working on this theory."

"You can buy all the materials for a human at your local apothecary." Ed said.

"Any kid can do that." Al added and the room fell silent as they thought about the implications of all this. Then Ed cleared his throat and they looked to him.

"Government sponsored research, just like we were talking about earlier with your surgeon. There is a lot that is goes on in these labs." Ed said angrily and got up to walk around again. He needed to shake off the mental images of Hughes and Nina, people they already lost by being oblivious to the way the government really worked. He turned around and looked at Mustang and Hawkeye, two more people they almost lost.

Roy huffed and looked at his hands. How the hell did they get to talking about government conspiracies from a mere intervention about his post-surgical obsession? He flexed his fingers and considered the extent of alchemy where even his hands were concerned. It was a routine procedure for that doctor, not some cutting edge technology they were dabbling with. That man, who he never heard of, was an alchemist who was capable of mending shattered bones and mutilated tissue. "We have no evidence except for your drawings and some speculation."

"The evidence is you." Riza said and brought Ed his tea to try and calm him down a little. "You haven't been the same since you came out of that room. You can be focused on your research but not like this, when have you ever read something and accepted it without questioning it?"

"I do it all the time when I sign shit in the office." He said with a smirk. He saw her worry, it was written all over her face, and he so desperately wanted to fix that. Her face didn't change, she wasn't going to be lured into his jokes.

"I read them in your stead." She watched Ed step around Roy's legs to take a seat on the couch.

Ed was glad Mustang was returning to his old self. The Colonel was always vibrant and sharp minded, even when he was daydreaming it was hard to sneak up on him. This man who he visited earlier was sluggish and caught up in the mire of his own thoughts. "You were drugged and it's very possible that seeds of thought were planted in your head while your brain was under the influence of that drug. Perhaps you were looking to fill in the gap made by that lost memory with _something_ or maybe _someone_ wanted you to forget something you already found out. You said yourself that the State Alchemists are human weapons, weapons the Fuhrer is proud to have in his arsenal. It's why they had to fix you, you are the only one remaining that has proven himself in battle. Scar has eliminated the others. They had to fix you, you are a prized weapon and if you were broken it would weaken Amestris. It would prove that our most powerful weapons are vulnerable. Removing knowledge of something like these homunculus and the military's involvement would be preferable to losing your power. It keep you safe from the truth and also keeps you for whatever these people might be planning."

"Yes!" Al said. "You have a memory gap, your mind is trying to find a way to fill in that void with something. Anything. Truth or not. It's horrible not remembering things, I know. It's so much easier to accept some concocted story, to fill in the blanks with something you do understand."

"Unfortunately the drug only removes recent memories not months of investigations." Roy said and Ed poured nearly half a cup of sugar into his tea and stirred it loudly. No wonder the kid was so hyper.

"Anything is possible." Al said. "Altering a drug doesn't take alchemy, any chemist could do that."

"It would explain why you went into the operating room knowing about Greed and Envy, then came out with a redirected obsession on the sins." Ed reached out and picked up the book and tasted his tea flavored sugar water. Perfect. "You've substituted something harmless for something that could make you dangerous. I don't think they want to take you out of play, even if the Fuhrer wants to keep you as a weapon, I think these other people need you for a human sacrifice. I think they need alchemists."

"So I do end up in Hell with you no matter what I do." Roy mumbled and Ed turned and stuck out his tongue at him.

"Maybe we can find this doctor?" Al asked. "Do you remember his name?"

"I don't. He had weird eyes, a gold tooth." Roy shivered again as the memory of the man's faced flashed in his head. "He used medical alchemy. Worked in one of the government labs and was hand picked by the Fuhrer himself. Dr. Dresden was in charge of my pre-op and post-op care but wasn't a surgeon."

"So the gold tooth guy, he's the one who fixed your hands?" Al asked.

"Yes." Roy said and flexed his hand. "No doubt about it. Alchemy is the only way I'd have movement so quickly, or ever."

"We don't need his name then." Ed said with a grin. "We know someone who was in those labs who could tell us about this guy from just a description. Someone familiar with the operating staff and the research alchemists."

"Barry!" Al exclaimed.

Roy nodded. There was a good possibility Barry would have come across this man and if he hadn't they could rule out the doctor as part of this scheme. It would do no good asking about the man at the hospital, it would only raise suspicions. They had to keep things as quiet as they could. "So find Barry, see what he knows."

"Yes, sir." Al said and felt better about the Colonel now. Much better.

Roy watched Ed get up and pet Hayate as he prepared to leave on his mission. "Be careful. We know we're on to something and clearly they will go to great lengths to ensure we stay in the dark."

Riza watched Ed wave off his concern and the boys made their way to the door to leave. She gave them both affectionate squeezes on the arm to show how much she appreciated their help. Ed gave her a sheepish smile and Al glowed even though he couldn't feel her touch. They opened the door and stepped out ready to start a new mission. "If Falman is still in the office you can ask him to show you to the safe house where we were holding Barry. He may still be using it as a place to stay."

After the boys left Roy looked up at her as she smiled down at him. "I'm well enough to..."

"You need to get well. You need to take the time to recover and also do your therapy so your hands heal properly. You can not rush this. " Riza said. She was happy he was actively engaging in discussion again but she knew where this was going. They needed evidence and answers and he wasn't going to get those sitting around his apartment. "I...just need you to leave this Hell behind and come back to Purgatory with us."

He cocked his head and said, "Oh book club is going to be so much fun."

"This book is draining you and lulling you into complacency." She looked down at her lap. "I'm sorry, but in all our years together I have never seen this side of you. It's not you. It's some kind of coping mechanism for something you can't make sense of and in order to see past it you have to come back to us. "

"I'm sorry I scared you." Roy said and picked up the book Ed had left sitting on the couch to give her a place to sit down. He and opened it up to one of the pages he wrote notes on. He searched until he found teh one he was looking for then he read aloud, " _The man who lies asleep will never waken fame, and his desire and all his life drift past him like a dream, and the traces of his memory fade from time like smoke in air, or ripples on a stream."_

"I still want to take that book and burn it, but that does have a lot of truth to it." Riza said and settled down into the couch beside him. "Are you back among the active sinners now?"

"Yes." Roy shut the book and set it down. "Mainly because I don't want to end up in Hell with Ed so I have to make sure I commit treason to get down to a different level."

Riza leaned over and brushed some hair from in front of his ear. He leaned into her touch and she whispered, "Don't forget my father was an alchemist too."

Roy leaned away from her as she smiled at him and playfully bit her lip. "God, if anything will make sure I do continue on my goals to take down Bradley it's going to be _that._ "


End file.
